Celebration of Love

I am so incredibly proud of my Mitt. We made it to the wedding and he did great. I know he didn't feel good but he was still classic Mike. He smiled, laughed, chatted, hugged and throughly enjoyed Lacey and Brendan's celebration of love.

The wedding was in Napa at 7 pm which was great since it was 100 degrees here and it was an outdoor wedding. We arrived at 6:30 for pictures and Mitt did great on the drive. He did rely on the norco and had to take it every 2 hours to get through but he made it. We both loved the fish tacos they served and we danced a sweet dance together and left for home about 9:30.

I was determined not to think about anything except the celebration and I didn't even cry. I surprised myself as in the weeks leading up to the wedding all I did was cry whenever I thought about it. My thought process would start taking over and I would be sad about all the things Mitt will miss and how much we will all miss him being in our lives.

I've been trying to meditate more and I realized in prayer and meditation that when my mind does this I am really missing out on the now. I vowed to do my best to stay in the moment and enjoy (be in joy) with my Mitt.

I've been so devastated for months I really don't want his last months with me to be filled with sadness. I know we will always have the sadness and when he is suffering I will suffer with him. Thankfully there will also be moments that the pain is manageable and we can share a laugh and when those moments are here I don't want my mind on the "if and when" I want to be fully present with my Mitt in our moment of laughter.

Yesterday was a big day for us, we gained a son. Welcome to the family Brendan. Lacey, I am so proud of you; you were such a beautiful bride and picked such a great guy. I know you two will create a very happy life.

It was very healing to see all the smiles, hear the laughter and to feel the love of two families and their friends. It was a true "Celebration of Love". We are all so blessed.